Wiscorksin Planning Council Laying Foundations to Acquire Land

Des Moines, IA - For months now, turmoil and conflict have stricken the lands* of Wiscorksin. The fine nation, with it's proactive arts movement, open drug policies, and charismatic "Why The Fuck Not?" slogan, has yet to furnish an earthen homestead of its own. However, a breakthrough has developed over the past few days. En route to Iowa City, Iowa, Foreign Minister "Huggy J" Huggins made brief Midwestern stops in Lincoln, Nebraska and Des Moines, Iowa to promote the Wiscorksin way of life. In a historic late morning/early afternoon, Minister Huggins, Jr. knighted/knightetted Sir Braden Miller, Sir Nicolas Sass, Sir Mark Obrist, Sir Joseph Grossman, and Madam Katie Bracken into the realms of the Wiscorksin nation (approval still pending from the Supreme Council). In this joy-euse of moments, the Intergalactic Wiscorksin Discussion of Scholarly Discussioners was immediately founded. Talks of acquiring land soon followed.

"Why not Pluto?", exclaimed Sir Miller. "It is no longer a planet, no one owns that shit!"

"Why the fuck not?", replyed the fellow discussioners.

Though a fault does lie within the thinking of Sir Miller, heroic and daring in his vision. The Wiscorksin Space and Teleportation Program is still in it's development phase, as seen in reruns of Star Trek: The Next Generation. It was eventually discussed that this was more a vision of future planning, pure brilliance, tastefully portrayed as ignorance by Sir Miller.

"People will soon flock to Pluto for reasons unknown to them. One day they will just keep driving and end up in our backyard, not really knowing why... (reminents of this monologue are missing but show uncanny similiarities to James Earl Jones' in "Field of Dreams"). Snickers arose from the peanut gallery, but were met with a reprise of jubilation once Sir Miller finished explaning his theory.

So, to the fellow Wiscorksinites, we shall soon have land.




In other news, local Boy Scout earns merit badge for Community Service by promoting and providing breast exams for older women.

* "land" is used for illustrative purposes